I remember in my early years listening to all the many stories from family and friends saying that when you have kids you won't have any privacy - especially in the bathroom.

Well, never was there a truer word been spoken.

I don't think l know anyone who would get an uninterrupted minute to themselves in a bathroom having young kiddies in the house. It's ironic that those same stories are being passed on to the kids of family and friends who are about to have children themselves.

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It all starts with multi-tasking and having the toilet door open only for the reason to keep an eye on a toddler who has becomes a wandering toddler.

Then comes the toilet training, with the potty always on standby, while sitting there yourself when the door barges open hitting your knees on the way through to a desperate little face busting to be on the potty next to you.

Then having them manage the toilet paper distribution while you're both sitting there where they ration you to two pieces or, worse still, hand over a crunched-up handfull.

There were also the many times I've had to deal with unwound rolls ... and, of course, I feel I need to try and roll it as neatly as possible back on to the roll.

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Why is it, when nature calls and you think surely the kids can do without you, they then come from the other end of the house yelling for you?

I start by staying very quiet, then it's like the world needs saving and things start to escalate very quickly - their voices get louder and louder: "Dad! Dad! Dad! Where are you?"

Ignoring them is a losing battle, so l reply: "I am in here."

Kids seem to know exactly where "here" is and, like flies to manure, the toilet door bangs open and the urgency of joining pieces of Lego together becomes apparent, or piece-by-piece, function-by-function you get a full description of something they have just finished creating.

More often than not, it's kids barging in all upset and wanting you to mediate a sibling disagreement while you're confined to the loo.

They know that you can't physically move and, believe me, having to try and mete out punishment to disagreeing children is hard work from this position.

Parents with young toddlers should forget trying to reclaim toilet independence. The days the toilet was a sanctuary are long gone.

Tell you what though, if you ever have trouble looking for your kids, head off to the toilet; it won't be long until they find you.