I SEEM to be finding myself on the wrong end of technology’s cutting edge of late.
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In fact last time I tried to open a new gizmo it was so cutting edge it sliced right through my finger.
And that was just the packaging.
Have you noticed that every new thingamybob, technical doo-dad and gadgety whatnot comes encased in a hard plastic coating that seems to be a new form of torture because it is damn near impossible to open without a sharp cutting instrument or explosives.
And if trying to force a pair of scissors or Stanley knife through the tough plastic is not enough of a hazard, the stuff always seems to have sharp edges that have a habit of slicing through the fingers of clumsy people like me.
It happened just the other day, and I’m now waiting in fear the cut will get infected and I will end up with some sort of dreaded computer virus surging through my veins, reprogramming all my hardwiring until I need to be permanently rebooted in the backside.
But why the heck is this happening?
Why are the makers of these little technological bits and pieces so intent on ensuring we have so much difficulty accessing them?
Is it about theft prevention, as I assume the companies would argue, or is it really just aimed at torturing the poor consumer in whatever way is possible, ensuring we feel too guilty to return anything faulty because we have been forced to mangle the packaging to access the particular product?
As they encase their products in plastic that cannot be opened, are the people in technological companies thumbing their noses at the rest of society, wreaking their horrible revenge on us for making fun of their geeky ways?
That is becoming a real worry in a world increasingly reliant on technology.
The old threat of the sporting types using muscles and physical presence while bullying the computer geek are long gone, because threats of physical violence pale into insignificance when comparted to the horror of having some geeky kid with thick glasses and dandruff hacking into home pages and social media accounts to reveal personal secrets and photos that should remain hidden from the world.
In fact I have to wonder if the 1980s comedy movie Revenge of the Nerds is actually coming true, and the techno-geeks are starting to take over the world and impose their horrible will on the rest of society.
Yes, it starts with impossible plastic packaging slicing into our fingers, spreads through threats to hack into Facebook accounts sporting kids in the school yards hand over their lunch money, and then where does it end?
Maybe even with the absolute horror or us all being forced to watch endless hours of old Dr Who programs … oh the humanity.